This may turn into a ‘You have to be over 18 to read this blog’ blog. And if you aren’t vegetarian, you may be after this …
Tomorrow is officially the Canadian Thanksgiving. But because my eldest is working tomorrow night, I’m preparing the turkey and all the ‘fixin’s’ today. The ‘Mom’ part of me came out and I asked my eldest to help me clean up the kitchen and prepare everything – figuring if he ever marries a vegetarian the way I did, he’d have to do this himself. (To which he replied, “No, we’ll just come here.”)
One of the most disgusting jobs involved in preparing the turkey is removing the neck and gizzards. I’d bought a frozen turkey on Thursday, it’s been defrosting ever since. The gizzards were packed in a nice little bag in the back end – easy to get to, easy to remove. The neck? Well, the neck wasn’t quite so easy. It had been stored deep in the ‘belly of the beast’ so to speak. And it decided it didn’t want to leave its nest. So I wash my hands with the anti-bacterial soap, remove my wedding ring and ‘delved deep’.
Here’s where the over 18 warning comes in.
I grab the part of the neck that I can reach inside the chest cavity and pull it, though the far end stays attached. Got the picture? Think about it – my hand wrapped around a turkey neck that’s protruding from an open orifice. My eldest makes the comment about … well, yeah, basically what it resembled, how it looks like I’m giving someone a hand job.
Talk about crack me up – I was laughing so hard. And, yup. I could see the resemblance. As you may gather, ES and I have a fairly open relationship where we discuss everything, pretty much no holds barred. (One day I’ll admit to a discussion we had on Friday about what I’d named my heroine’s boat and why he was horrified.)
Anyway, I finally free the dang necked from the chest cavity and … (if you’re thinking of turning vegetarian, this might do it) hanging from the neck are several large feathers, and the wattle. Yup, they’d actually left the wattle attached. Sort of cool and gross all at the same time.
In the meantime, the turkey’s cooking to a lovely golden brown and I have no compunction in enjoying cutting into it tonight and slathering it with gravy and stuffing.