A friend of Gizmo Guys often sends him jokes that GG forwards to me. I wasn’t sure whether to laugh or to cry at this one …
This is an actual extract from a sex education school textbook for girls, printed in the early 60’s in the UK and explains why the world was much happier and peaceful then…!
When retiring to the bedroom, prepare yourself for bed as promptly as possible. Whilst feminine hygiene is of the utmost importance, your tired husband does not want to queue for the bathroom, as he would have to do for his train. But remember to look your best when going to bed. Try to achieve a look that is welcoming without being obvious. If you need to apply face-cream or hair-rollers wait until he is asleep as this can be shocking to a man last thing at night. When it comes to the possibility of intimate relations with your husband it is important to remember your marriage vows and in particular to commitment to obey him.
If he feels the need to sleep immediately then so be it. In all things be led by your husband’s wishes; do not pressure him in any way to stimulate intimacy. Should your husband suggest congress then agree humbly all the while being mindful that a man’s satisfaction is more important than a woman’s. When he reaches his moment of fulfillment a small moan from yourself is encouraging to him and quite sufficient to indicate any enjoyment that you have had.
Should your husband suggest any of the more unusual practices be obedient and uncomplaining but register any reluctance by remaining silent. It is likely that your husband will then fall promptly asleep so adjust your clothing, freshen up and apply your night-time face and hair care products.
You may then set the alarm so that you can arise shortly before him in the morning. This will enable you to have his morning cup of tea ready when he awakes.
… says Gizmo Guy: “That had to be written by a guy.” Unfortunately, I’m betting it wasn’t. (That’s exactly my mother’s and mother-in-law’s ways of thinking.) I’m so glad I grew up after the days of the sexual revolution. Although frankly my mother’s mother was there far before me. But that’s a story for another day.