I should have listened to Fozzy Bear


All right Mother Nature, enough already. Yes, I know Wylie’s kids are having fun building snow forts and toboganning but we adults have had enough of shoveling the darned stuff out of the driveways. Besides we’ve had enough now to guarantee us a white Christmas. (Although I understand that it for officially be a white Christmas it has to snow on Christmas morning itself, I consider it a white Christmas if there’s snow on the ground no matter when it fell.) To make matters worse, according to a report I’ve just read, it’s supposed to snow pretty much every day between now and New Year’s. Ugh.


I’ve been filling up the bird feeder with black sunflower seeds and we’ve been having fun watching the birds swooping around all day: chickadees, house finches, juncos and mourning doves, along with a pair of downy woodpeckers on the suet feeder. (Can you tell the difference in the pictures between the male and the female woodpeckers?)


They went through the seed by midafternoon, and not wanting to let them go hungry, I grabbed the seed funnel and stepped out into knee-high snow wearing only my running shoes. I made it safely all the way out to the shepherd’s hook that the feeder is hung on. Trouble was the funnel only holds enough seed to fill half the feeder. So carrying the half-filled feeder in one hand and the funnel in the other, I turned and slogged back through the drifts to the patio door. I’d made it half way when my right foot slid out from under me.

You know those passages you read when people say ‘time slowed down for them’? That’s what happened to me. I knew I was falling, and tried to figure out if there was a way to regain my balance but after a few gyrations I realized I’d probably get hurt worse and just let myself fall smack on my butt. At least it was a soft landing in the snow, more cold than anything. And I didn’t even spill any seed, much to the ground-feeding birds’ and squirrels’ disgust.

Gizmo Guy was watching and when he came to help me, he said, “That wasn’t the most graceful fall I’ve ever seen.” Gee, thanks, GG.

So I leave you with a clip from one of Guitar Hero’s favorite Christmas shows when he was a kid – the Muppet Family Christmas. Unfortunately it’s not shown much any more, but he used to watch it over and over again and then warn everyone for weeks afterward to “be careful of the icy patch.”